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sábado, 6 de fevereiro de 2010

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As vezes dá vontade de sair correndo, de trancar a porta de não ver mais nada. As vezes dá vontade de voltar a uma vida que hoje em dia  PRA MIM não faz mais sentido, mas parece que pros outros ainda faz. Dá vontade de chorar de saber que nada mais vai ser como antes, vontade de gritar de implorar 100% de companheirismo.

Tenho vontade de pagar tudo na mesma moeda, de não segurar nenhum tipo de impulso, de me livrar de estar tão dependente. Eu não suporto depender de algo pra viver, acho que é por isso que eu sempre tive tanto meus pensamentos certos de como deve ser a minha vida.

É maravilhoso estar grávida, sim é sim, é um momento único, eu não vejo a hora de ver meu filho no meu braço, mas ao mesmo tempo eu me sinto  TÃO impotente, tão limitada, tão insegura, longe não saber o que realmente esta acontecendo e pior, eu fico em casa tranquila, eu faço coisas tranquilamente, eu não posso beber, eu não posso sair como antes, acho isso estranho, paradoxo...

Eu to com raiva, não da gravidez, mas de outras coisas, de pessoas que parecem não se importat, raiva de não ser mais a Mari que chamava atenção e causava ciumes e me tornar a Mari  MAMÃE... Eu quero ser desejada... eu quero q tenha ciumes... eu quero...


ahhh vou dormir pra isso passar...

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74 comentários:

Di disse...

Oi amor... Bom dia. ^^
E sim, é um otimo dia! Pronto, to com inveja! rs Serio, to mesmo! To com inveja de você ter colocado em q=palavras algo que eu sinto a basicamente um ano.

Queria te dizer coisas boas, queria te dizer muitas e muitas coisas, mas o fato é que me sinto como você. E espero que isso ja seja, de alguma forma, bom: saber que você não esta sozinha.

Quero te agradecer então, por que ler seu post me deu coragem para fazer o meu.

E, quero então, te fazer um convite: terça feira agora tem uma sessão de cinema, as 14h, no Unibanco Arteplex da Augusta, que é especial do Cinematerna. Eu quero muito ir, levar a Beca e tudo. Vamos?

Vamos ver varias outras mulheres, mães, pais e seus bebes (ou barrigas)! Pode ser bem mais util do só uma ida ao cinema "normal", rs

O filme que vai passar é "Nine".

Ah, garotas que leem aqui, vcs tb estão convidadas, ok?

JULIANA disse...

Oi Mari ... não se culpe ou se preocupe! Isso é normal ... nos sentimos assim mesmo. Principalmente pois estamos muito vulneráveis, sensíveis. Te entendo, pois sinto isso às vezes também! Mas logo passa ... pense no Dimitri que tudo vai embora!! :o)
Bjosss na barriga!
Ju

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É a gravidez é uma mudança drástica na vida de qualquer mulher, mas vc tem muito medo de mudanças e sempre teve! Fica tranqüila mudar é inevitável, mas sempre vai ter coisas na vida, minha vida tb esta em fase de mudança, agora tudo vai ficar mais serio e eu prometo te dar um sobrinho para acompanhar o Dimi em breve (não tão breve assim)!
Bjs

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